I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
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