So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Randomize