Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
