haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
Drunk tip #47: Its better to overestimate how many plastic bottles itll take to urinate in, rather then underestimate.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
Randomize
