Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize
