I wish i was in the wii world.
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
My parents don't seem to understand that all I want to do over break is smoke in bed and watch Workaholics.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
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