After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Randomize
