porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
I just took a shit with a lightsaber in my hand. Dreams fulfilled.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
Randomize
