Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
Ran into my prostitute at Costco yesterday. She was with her boyfriend, I was with my kids. Awwwwkward.
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
I just googled "creative ways to tell someone you'll give them a blow job". I'm losing my touch.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
Randomize
