Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Randomize
