4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
I'm not sure what your ex was trying to say to me I was too busy chanting your name in his face
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize
