there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
I had a dream involving the worlds smallest pony, an asphalt volcano, and jimi hendrix. Never smoking 3 bowls before bed again
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
