So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
Sundays should be dedicated to Girl Scout cookies, sex, and super hero movies.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I peed my pants and am still dancing with guys at the club because I liked my outfit too much to change. Call the ratchet emergency
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
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