don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
