yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
Had to drive my booty call home because he had an asthma attack after we had sex .. How was your night?
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Randomize
