it actually wasnt that awkward...i planned on saying hello and walking away..then she asked if i wanted to go to lunch and i looked at her chest and said absolutely
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
Tried to make hash outta one of those keurig machines. I don't know why. Maybe the drunkenness, but now I have mushy bud and no ganja
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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