hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
i will never coherently bang her
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
Randomize