You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
Damn it, I know in the morning I'm going to regret eating out of the trash...
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
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