"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
Randomize
