thus making me awesome and them whores
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Randomize
