I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
I started dry heaving in the middle of sex and she says "You moan funny."
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Randomize
