I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
Since you haven't talked to me since the rancid whipped cream fiasco, I'm going to assume we are no longer hooking up. But I need my handcuffs back. ASAP.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
I lost my favorite bra in his hotel room. Is it bad that that's the only reason I hope he texts me tomorrow?
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
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