Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
Randomize
