My secretary told me she wishes she can have an affair with someone in the office (she's separated from her cheating husband)...Umm...Okaaay
You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
Randomize