idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
Randomize
