Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
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