Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
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