it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Did I just hear you ask Siri about the meaning of life?
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
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