I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
On the verge of sleeping with a man who can take me to an early bird dinner and a movie with his AARP discount. YOLO
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
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