So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
Send help, water and tortillas.
Sex in the moonbounce later?
This is why I love you.
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
