Well douche your snatch and let's go!
i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
