i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
That was the first time I have seen a confused expression with a dick in the mouth
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
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