he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
is that a dick in a sweater?
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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