so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
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