we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
i took it, then realized you live 3 ours away. but if you start driving now, im almost positive I'll still be hard
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
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