One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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