Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
