im so drunk with asians
where?
always
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize
