I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
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