sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
