i think my mom watched the whole time
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
Nooo, I ran into two if my exes, both having their engagement parties at the bar. It was like a fucking Eskimo family reunion, but with more tequila.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
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