I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
Our idea of a "deep conversation" was successfully forming complete sentences.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
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