wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
Sacagawea was the original milf.
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Randomize
