he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
He's a fucking ninja- think of the things he can probably do with his dick.
Yes I’m serious. I just worked YOUR 12 hour shift on 3 hours of sleep if you come over without tacos and an ice cream cake in hand we are done
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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