Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
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