That fat broad you banged out last night is still here and I can hear her snoring through the living room wall. I would leave, but I don't want to come home to an empty fridge.
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
