Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
You were riding my three year old's train yelling, 'I think I can, I think I can!!'
I thought I could.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
You can only use the "she handcuffed me naked to your bed, i couldn't do anything, sorry bro" excuse once.
You have a tempurpedic. you only have you to blame.
Dear god my vagina.
Randomize
