Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
