Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
I am more than mildly offended he didn't screenshot the snapchat of my boobs.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
I knew it was all downhill from there when the straight vodka I was drinking tasted like water.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
Randomize
