Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
This is a mass text to all my friends. Whoever gets this first, please find me and confiscate my phone immediately. I am far too high to have it. Even if you have to punch me in my face to get it. Otherwise, let the "High While Analyzing Disney Movies" texts begin.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
Randomize
